Pulse

It's steady.
At least When you're around,
but the rush is sometimes misunderstood.
...i guess i can wait another day.
Maybe it's better if i sleep.
Maybe i can kiss you in my dreams.
Without that feeling,
Rejection.
Why are you still here.
You have assured and assured again.
But somehow this fate is still up to the stars.
The ones that tell my story.
About how the sun walks,
or how the moon talks.
And how they chase eachother until day becomes night,
and night becomes...
Rejection.
I need to know involuntary again.
Too fast, and the heart falls to pieces.
Too late like the ghosts soon to be...
Rejected.

You can count on that.

I'm mixed up when I'm breathing lust
for shit i've learned to dread.
I lose track and get bored
with the storage system in my head.
and all the words she says can strangle all that's left for self-esteam
I've failed the test that seeks for evidence of if she's listening.

I waste time when resting my eyes
but i sleep for the cause
She's out there where nobody cares
she knows it's not her loss
and it takes away the fundamental status quo to be
as i pretend to be the everything, of what she asks of me

I know in dreams you feel nothing
but nightmares alway bring you pain
I know thet kisses give you luck
but your life is screwed if you get fucked
at least that's what they say.
you can count on that anyway.

I've been sure that i have no worth
to anyone with hands
I know love means nothing at all
without the bullet cans
but she drags on all her past to the present as if there were no years
she doesn't know the things i whisper when she neglects the sounds she hears

I know in dreams you feel nothing
but nightmares alway bring you pain
I know thet kisses give you luck
but your life is screwed if you get fucked
at least that's what they say.
you can count on that anyway.

I know in dreams you feel nothing
but nightmares alway bring you pain
I know thet kisses give you luck
but your life is screwed if you get fucked
at least that's what they say.
you can count on that anyway.

i do have 2 coming

i just haven't had time to edit/post, i will post posibly on thursday...

Sometimes we forget...

We forget who we are when we forget we're walking.
Or how to walk even.
Or how to talk even.
We slur and stammer and the wind takes us away.
We forgot about that summers day.
It was too hot to move and the breeze felt more like pressure.
I didn't want to go where it was taking me.
I wanted to stand still, but i forgot how.

We forget who we are when we forget that we're sleeping.
Or how to sleep even.
Or how to dream even.
We forget to build hopes and the sun burns our future.
We forget about a lazy afternoon.
It was not oour typical deja vu and the psychic sense was more like tingling.
I didn't want to know what was happening.
I wanted to be dumb, but i forgot how.

We forget who we are when we forget that we're dying.
Or how to die even.
Or how to end even.
We forget that the conclusion is less important than the climax.
We forget about a summers evening filled with stars.
It was not our idea to lose face in the midst of all this anxiety.
I didn't want to be dead.
I wanted to be alive, in your eyes, but i forget how.

Aim and Snap

Aim and Snap,
Aim and Snap,
These pictures tell something about us.
I found one today.
You never knew that i kept this one.
It's a shame the world was just passing by behind us.
It's funny to see how it turned out.
No,
it's not funny at all.

Aim and Snap,
Aim and Snap,
we couldn't have cared any less at the time.
Every time the sun set we photographed a world of closed eyes.
And on a night like tonight,
your smile is unforgettable, especially when you hide in it.

Aim and Snap,
Aim and Snap,
Aim and Snap,
Aim and Snap.
People forget that this can lead to denile,
and denile is a whole mess of faces and ideas we're just not ready for.
So we walk down this road.
Camera in hand.
It's been used before.
Many eyes, Many Lies.
Who was i kidding.

She Knows Exactly

She speaks in tongues.
Writing graffiti on the walls of hell,
She knows exactly how to kill me.

She gestures in rythm,
cause it's impossible to rhyme.
She knows exactly how to kill me.

She recites her lyrical hit list with a feather in her hat
In hopes to get my attention,
In hopes that she can sway my mind for the good of mankind.
She's an artist and an activist.

She uses her talents against my ill-witted soul.
She knows exactly how to kill me.
She waits for a sign,
For the light to hit just right.
She knows exactly how to kill me.

On a friday night while the others plan out their pathetic lives
She lurks in the corner of a room,
belonging to a day dream skeptic.
She knows exactly how to kill me.
She's an angel, and she's doing what's best,


.......but she doesn't know i'm already dead.

My Whole World Was Bliss...

Maybe i'm not ready for all this,
I just want it to slow down.
We were kids once,
and as kids it meant everything.
Do you even care anymore?
For awhile i was standing on top of the slide feeling like the king of the world,
I just wanted to hear you laugh.
That sound to my ears was a dream,
it made my knees weak, and falling down the slide was my whole world.
My whole world was bliss.
Of Course those three seconds of free fall took so much time when i was younger,
now,
three seconds is too short.
By the time i climb to the top again,
That brat on the monkey bars will be making you cry.
I never realized than,
that it was never about making you laugh
It was about proctecting you...
Maybe i'm not ready for this,
I just want it to slow down,
We were kids once,
and we held hands during that trip across the park.
That's is something i'll never forget.

Under The Oak Tree

We seemed to stay quiet about those moments under the oak tree,
but I know it was not the branches that had sworn us to secrecy,
It was a seed planted by our own wicked minds, and a guilty conscience...
For what exactly.
The leaves never exactly violated us,
The leaves were more a consolation,
The leaves perhaps saved our lives more than once.
But the first we blamed is a tree.
"Damn you for growing here.
Surely you could have picked a better spot."
The things that happened under the oak tree were for us,
it was either our fault for getting there,
or it was our fault for leaving.
All i want is to go back and lay under the shade for awhile.
When you are ready to admit you loved everything about those moments,
the Oak will be expecting an apology.

Fool On The Floor

At Night i Feel the Cold,
It burns in a way that some might call satisfying,
I call it pointless.
I blame the bedroom walls... and the ceiling,
the doors, and the windows,
for a world less meaningful than those made in movies.
But i would never even bother the floor.
It spends most of the day being walked on...
it doesn't need to soak in my shit.
I've heard you breathing hear,
"I still have many secrets in this place.
Will you ever bother to ask?"
A whisper of trickery no doubt,
Ha, and you thought me a fool

.....well i'll admit it.
I am, I'm your bloody fool and i'm sick of it.
But the bedroom floor is never gunna say it to your face.

Goodnight...

Shit Hits The Fan

Last night you forgot your f*ckin' manners
Last night you forgot to say hello
This years not over til tomorrow
There's still enough time to forget to grow

Last night your lips fell off the table
Last night you left me for the fall
Last night your smile kept me disabled
Last year was to long to count at all

So this is it, this is what it's like
To take on the world everynight
I thought this time that you might get it
I've never been Mr. Right

Last night i decided to break the strings
Last night the the things i touched were ruined
Last year i was forced to clean my broken wings
This years flight, it crashed, i'm screwed.

So this is it, this is what it's like
to know when to throw the fight
I thought i'd never understand
I've never been Mr. Right

Last night you built this fence
Last you ditched me on right angle road
Last night i choked on my words
Last year it was the fault of my own

So this is it, this is what it's like
to bleed from fingers you write
it's time that you take a look around
I've never been Mr. Right

Last night i kept a word or two myself
Last night you killed some bloody time
Last night we skipped through photo albums
Last year i commited suicide.

Last night it was in the wrong place
Last night i was the right man
Last night the words were erased
Last night the Shit hit the Fan